Lets face it lads, we have all been there. You’ve planned a night out with one of your best mates and there are a couple of your girl mates coming along too.
Out of nowhere he drops out and more often than not its for a feeble reason that really doesn’t add up. Suddenly you are stuck with no other option but to still go out.
Brace yourself as you are about to experience a girls’ night out, and its one hell of a journey.
From a guy’s perspective this could easily just become a night in its self. Take the amount of time it would get ready to go out normally and then times that by at least four and you have some idea of how long this stage takes.
You are present for this part of the night, but that is all. Whilst they socialise and pre-drink you are just there.. questioning if it will ever end. Don’t dare question them on their time keeping, just sit there are smile.
After this part, you will wonder how any of your female friends are still here with you today. It would be sexist to say boys can handle their drink better as it’s mostly down to the individual, but when you see your friend rolling around on the floor like a trout out of water you do wonder.
Tears.. Every time.
The tears are inevitable. At least one person will cry, but why? why does someone always have to cry. Sometimes its for no reason, or for a reason that doesn’t even exist. When the water works come be prepared for everyone to get involved, including yourself.
Tread carefully though as the moment you step up to comfort them in their moment of need you are directly in the firing line and its fire at will.
Someone gets lost
No matter what you do, someone will get lost. Why does someone always get lost?.
The only logical solution would be to track them with either a drone (may have difficulties getting into the club) or a GPS tracker. The route to the toilets is a potential threat here, as is the walk home. It always happens.
Fighting off creepers
Not really a problem you have to deal with when you are a guy, as you are normally the ones doing the creeping.
This is certainly an eye-opening experience at first as you don’t realise how weird some guys are until you spend an hour in the club battling them off your girl friends. The sheer number of creepers is actually quite astounding, they seem to appear from the shadows and then fade back into them.
Like being in a horror movie only that the creepy soundtrack is replaced with banging club music.
Prepare for the onslaught of photos, by the end of it you’re going to end up feeling like a B list celebrity. You have to ask yourself is it really necessary to take this many photos?
At the start of the night its understandable as you are looking your best, but as the drinks flow and the night becomes more and more messy you stop looking your best and suddenly taking toilet pictures becomes acceptable?
Toilet pictures are a big no. Don’t worry though you won’t be invited for this part either. You are safe.
The Long Journey Home
The long journey home is comparable to the trip Frodo has to make to Mordor in the Lord Of The Rings Trilogy. At this point all everyone wants to do is curl up at home and go to sleep, but god forbid you skip the drunken eating before that.
No matter what happens, cheesy chips or a Doner Kebab are at the top of priorities before returning home. You never heard the words ‘healthy’ or ‘eating clean’ before they went out, so you should have seen this coming.