21 Deep Questions That Need Answering in 2016

We need answers!
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If humanity achieves anything in 2016 it should be to answer these 21 incredibly important and deep questions. How is anyone going to be able to get to sleep at night if we don't know how a dog would wear pants if it wore pants!? we need answers!.

1. How long will a crayon burn in a non-emergency?

2. Why do various people fail trigonometry?

3. Why is it always old people that drive slowly?

4. Do you think size really matters?

5. Why do we have gendered shampoo?

6. What do bagels really think about the world around them?

7. Why is this ok?

8. Has this ever happened?

9. Would he change his name?

10. Would Tom Cruise do the unthinkable?

11. Asking the important questions!

12. Is this an act of forced cannibalism?

13. Why do Android users do this?

14. An important philosophical question...

15. Indeed, who?

16. Do caterpillars even know what they're doing?

17. Which nipples do centaur babies prefer?

18. Is every girl with short hair actually Mulan?

19. Did this actually happen?

20. What are the proper lyrics to 'we will rock you'?

21. Finally, why was captain underpants left out?

h/t Buzzfeed